After what The Husband has done, it’s definitely time to put some distance between us. Admittedly, some of the fault is on me but nonetheless, corrective measures must be taken.
Oh, fine. It’s me, I’m the problem. And while I’d like to cast blame on someone other than myself or even something beyond my control, I can’t do that with a clear conscience. The man who has been with me through thin and thick is certainly not at fault. At least no more so than any other devoted spouse.
But he’s really gone too far this time and has gotten much too close for comfort. Dangerously close to a real shift in our dynamics. For many couples, this type of dynamic is a standard in their relationship and that’s perfectly fine. It hasn’t been that way for us and I’m finding it to be most troublesome.
So, have you caught on yet to what’s been happening? Did I drop enough clues with the puns I added to help you out? I hope that you’re not at a total loss about what’s going on between me and The Husband.
Alright, here’s the scope. Since last August, The Husband has lost some weight. Not just some, a significant amount. 50ish pounds, more or less, mostly more. He did it by reducing his portions, cutting back some on carbs, and limiting his snacking. By observation and a few limited discussions we had on the subject, he did a bit of intermittent fasting by limiting his daily intake of food to a set number of hours a day as well which was new to him.
This weight loss has moved The Husband from a BMI of over 35 to squeaking in just under 30 which is amazing for him. Not only does he look better, he feels so much better now. The lower back and neck pain he had been struggling with for a number of years is virtually gone. It’s been over 15 years since he’s been in this weight class.
What’s the problem then, right? Well, while The Husband has been losing weight, I have not. And not just that, in the last year or so I’ve gained 10 pounds. This is not me being petty. I’m truly happy that The Husband lost the weight that he did. It’s just that it has brought us closer in a way that I’d never anticipated we would be.
I came to realize this situation after we had returned from our trip to Washington in April. We all know the challenges that being away from home presents for making smart dietary choices. I typically try to do the best that I can and resolve to get back on track once I’m home again.
We were gone for 10 days on that trip. The morning after our return home, I weighed myself and was pretty pleased that I’d only gained a pound which was really nothing. When The Husband weighed himself, he said that he’d lost three pounds and announced a number that was the same as mine. I hadn’t told him what my weight was so you can imagine my horror/disbelief/surprise at his pronouncement. Obviously, the scale had malfunctioned so I fiddled around with it and then he weighed himself again. Still the same. 😱
How could he do this to me?
Or more aptly, how could I do this to me? After retiring three years ago, I’d managed to lose about 15 pounds over the course of about 18 months which I’ve since regained. It’s been well over a year since I last worked out at my gym and eight months since I averaged more than 5,000 steps a day. There’s really no excuse for such a low level of activity because I’m perfectly healthy. No aches, no pains, no limitations on my abilities.
How do I turn this situation around? That’s the proverbial $64,000 question. It’s a dilemma that’s been weighing heavily on me for some time now. This isn’t the first time I’ve written a “drawing a line in the sand” post about setting a goal and developing a plan to lose weight. Hopefully, though, it will be the last.
Let’s Wrap This Up
Now, onto the Fine-Whatever link-up. Today’s featured post from the last link-up, Classic Parisian Chic, was shared by Kathrine over at her eponymous blog Kathrine Eldridge. This fabulous look she’s wearing is proof that not all is always as it seems.
Shy of baking calorie-laden treats for The Husband, I definitely need to do something if I’m going to regain some distance between him and me. I’ll start on that tomorrow. Wish me luck.
Stay well and let’s keep in touch! Subscribe, tweet, follow, friend, pin … all options are available. I look forward to hearing from you soon.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Note: This is an unsponsored post; however, some or all of the links to clothing items are associated with an affiliate program where I earned a few cents for each click.
Photo credit: MMPerez
27 Comments
Congrats to your husband! My youngest son has shed 27 pounds almost the exact same way your husband has. He has really committed to this, and I’m so glad for him. I, on the other hand, am feeling your pain. I just can’t seem to get with it! Add to that I’m taking a new medication designed to help chemo patients gain weight (that’s not why I’m taking it, obviously)! So, any new weight gain will be blamed on that!
Thanks so much for the link party! Look for a post about June’s 10 on the 10th soon!
https://marshainthemiddle.com/
Weight gain is SO HARD as we age. I’m going through this myself! My boyfriend easily fasts until 5p.m. each day and I just can’t do it. Instead I eat zero carbs, clean the house, walk between 5-11 miles each day at work and I’ve lost exactly 2 pounds in over 2 weeks! It’s ridiculous! I totally feel your pain. Hang in there.
Thanks for your sympathies, Marsha. And the worst of it is that I don’t have much of any bad dietary habits to correct that would “fix” my weight problems.
Thanks for being real about your situation between you and your husband. I would feel the same way and am also finding that I’m gaining weight as I get older. Trying to find the balance between healthy eating and enjoying sweets. It’s a constant battle! Love your classic look. I adore the denim jacket. Thanks so much for the link up and for the feature!
https://www.kathrineeldridge.com
You’re very welcome about being featured, Kathrine. And I appreciate your support during these trying times 😉
I like the printed shoes with this classic outfit, and your post made me smile! Well done to your husband, and it’s good to see that it’s amused you with this post. I hope if you do have similar goals as your husband you manage to meet them all 🙂
I am trying, Mica. I am trying. Thanks for the outfit love.
I have been more active lately but have struggled with the sweets angle: I sometimes just will eat them (mostly ice cream cones) just because they are there and not even because I enjoy them that much. So this week I have a short term goal of making my sweets be only fruit!
http://www.chezmireillefashiontravelmom.com
There are times that I also struggle with sweets and ice cream is a weakness for me as well. I find that it’s best not to have those things in the house.
Good for your husband! My husband and I have been doing ketovore. He loses faster than I do, and soon we will weigh the same. I understand. My progress has been very slow, but I have progress, so I won’t complain. 9 pounds down since mid March. Did I mention the loss is slow….? What I’ve noticed is that food is associated with so much more than quenching hunger. It’s social. It’s a form of caring (my mom keeps trying to cook things on our diet, even though we’ve told her it’s not necessary), it can be used as a reward for an achievement, and yes, it can be a comfort. Food is freaking complicated!
Michelle
https://followingmymuse.space
Our “relationships” with food are absolutely complicated, Michelle. I’ve long wished for a pill that could provide my daily nutritional needs so that I wouldn’t need to deal with “what am I going to eat” and the planning and prepping.
Meal planning and prepping is a great big pain! I know for some people it is creative, but it has never been that for me. I feel you.
We have the opposite problem over here!
Rena, thank you for being so candid and sharing this with us. You did so in such a delightful and fun way. My husband is naturally very thin but he also watches what he eats and practices such good self control. Meanwhile, I sweat my rear off working out 7 days a week and have been so careful about food. The struggle is real and I bet we can all relate!
xo,
Kellyann
I’m glad that you enjoy this post, Kellyann. And the challenges of being a “woman of a certain age” are certainly not easy.
My husband is skinny and I am…uh…not. I have long gotten used to Jack & Mrs. Sprat situation and it doesn’t bother me, but I know that it’s hard for many women to handle due to social norms about the ideal relative size of men and women.
Thank you, Sally, I appreciate your perspective. That was the case with my parents so I’ve often feared having a weight problem like my mother had.
Yes losing weight it an ongoing struggle for many of us, so good on your husband. Hopefully I will be able to get back to it now that I have had my knee replacement some three months ago and can start walking, without a walker or cane again. Yippee and with the warmer weather, I truly hope that the weight will also then decide its time to disappear with the extra walking. Thanks for the Linkup opportunity
It is quite remarkable that he lost so much weight and how much his quality of life has improved. Good luck getting back up to speed with your new knee.
Thanks Rena, One day, one week at a time, but slowly slowly I am getting there.
Congrats to your husband on his weight loss and thanks for sharing this. It’s hard when numbers related to our weight and health get so close. My husband eats what ever he wants and is basically unhealthy yet has low cholesterol and I try to eat healthy, workout daily and have very high cholesterol. It’s really not fair. LOL.
Jill – Doused in Pink
Oh, that is a dilemma! Your husband has done very well. Men seem to lose weight quite easily, my husband is trim at the moment having given up desserts and his daily beer, ready for his cycling holiday in unforgiving lycra. Could you get your husband to train with you at the gym? I’ve just bought an ebike so that I can cycle with J.
That’s very impressive of your husband. I’m trying to gain weight, but it’s just as hard as to lose some.
Luckily my hubby is over 6′ tall and will likely never be near my weight. That was honestly a positive for me! Haha! I understand where you are coming from because men are typically larger/taller than women, but there are so many factors. Either way, I hope you do whatever you need to in order to feel comfortable with your body!
oh dear, congrats on your husband dear. Lovely post
https://www.melodyjacob.com/2023/06/summertime-family-friendly-outdoor-activities.html
Congrats to your husband. I hope that this dilemma gets solved in your favor.
The denim look and print footwear is nice
https://www.melodyjacob.com/2023/06/tesco-extracts-cocoa-butter-body-lotion.html